existential depression

He made yet another error and the driver called him stupid, for the umpteenth time. He reaches boiling point and freezes, after erupting and letting the canon loose, as he switches seats with the instructor, only today was different. Having just fallen out two days earlier, as suppressed rage again surfaced, he was expected to take his punishment of being relegated to the passenger seat, as the instructor took over, only this time, when the instructor went to make that manoeuvre, as he couldn’t lock him out, he tried to abandon the driver and ride off in the car. Unfortunately the plan was foiled as the driver managed to rescue the situation by jumping back in the car and demanding the learner trade places, and yet, the situation had died long ago. Even as their lesson began, an error was made within less than a minute of entering the car. Maybe the learner did or didn’t see it, but clearly, being so occupied and hampered in perspective, something else was clocking up mileage on their mind. We know already it was the instructor. The learner simply intended to drive about for the day without saying a word, and for the most part, this worked, only the instructor’s burning rage remaining, as eventually their bitterness surfaced. Two hour lessons in a car get very intense, and with the situation already hanging by a thread, and managed by a string, it was no surprise when it fell apart.

On his way home, the learner was amused by the situation as in the past; he was left walking home the bitter one. It was cathartic. As he was exiting the vehicle, as the instructor had asked him prior, he asked the instructor if he was on drugs, for this was the final violation. At this point, unlike his own response, the instructor said yes, but added that as he, the learner, would not be coming back into the car again, the learner should find someone else to drive him to his test due in less than three days time. The learner had someone in mind; however, playing safe, when he got home, he called the driving organisation manager to try to identify another possible driver. At this point, the manager, who up until that point had put on an amusing act, had their disguise wear thin, as finally, their true colours shone. The learner was told that he, the manager, would not be manipulated. That he learner could be mature about the situation and try and resolve It; that the instructor was rational and would not just do something without cause; he was told that he, the manager, could not suddenly change plans for less than three days and draft in an alternative instructor whose car could be used; he was told that he had an ultimatum: he could report the instructor on Monday, for “verbal abuse”, and have the test go down as a fail, or he could call up the instructor and try and resolve the issue. It was his choice.

The learner was so delighted to finally see a break in the fraudulent authenticity, he attempted to put the phone on loud speaker and record the conversation, but he accidentally hung up. Upon calling back, he was met by a very different service manager who seemed to have reviewed and modified their conduct. This time, he was told that maybe he, the learner, and the instructor, had a heated moment and lost their cool; that as the manager, he would call the instructor and make him take the learner to the test; that he was on the learners side; the biggest difference was that the manager said that he would also gain from the learner passing the practical, for he had a target of ten licences for the year, with the learner expected to be one of them. It seemed that his talk with his secretary, in addition to the time between the calls, had changed him, as he reverted back to his “Christian” values, which he apparently professed, drove him to create the driving school charity to begin with. Of course, as the white overseer, those who know didn’t buy any of it from the out, however, for the sake of obtaining their licences, they would limit their contact with him, tolerate his falsehoods, and get through the school, and yet, if only it were that easy. Of course, there are those who would say that situations ought to be tolerated if there were reward to be had at the end, and yet, is this true? Many Palmer Hall would surely protest this.

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