If you wonder about the minstrel; he is in pain. From far, you see a smile, but close up, you see the age; you see the signs of wear and tear; someone worn down by distress and angst; the anguish of existence; the torment of simply being tortured.
“One day I’m gonna bust, blow up on this society. Why did you lie to me? I couldn’t find a trace of equality”
“Any writer, I suppose, feels that the world into which he was born is nothing less than a conspiracy against the cultivation of his talent”
Likewise, I’m fed up with pretending I can’t type fast in here, when in reality, I can loosely touch type – the three publications and two in pending might explain that. I’m tired of having to seem pathological in order to get support, hence, I find myself resigned to searching for those three elusive texts
Dabrowski “Mental Growth Through Positive Disintegration”
Korzykski, “Science and Sanity” (1st edition), and
Wattenburg “The Forms of Power”
I would also like a copy of Cleckley’s “The Mask Of Sanity” (1st edition), but that siply reflects an obsession with antiquity, originality, and essentially, authenticity, and yet, as with many habits and idiosyncracies, as well as routines and patterns, that may not be absolutely necessary. Likewise, perhaps I can just read the much abridged, “selections from science and sanity” and come away with something equally important, and yet, for someone who cherished reading “Yurugu” and “In Search Of The Miraculous.”, I like the idea of devoting oneself to completing a book – provided we’re not talking about “War and Peace.”
To continue, the sadness and ridiculousness of this situation is that just as with depression, in order to remain here, it seems you have to “seem” “okay” “enough”. In other words, unless you seems psychotic,deficient or likewise, you are unwanted property rather than demanded, damaged goods.
People like myself, intelligent, briany, “bright” people are those who threaten these institutions becuase they can record these policies and see through the failings and the fraud. People like myself worry these people as we pose the potential to “write journals” and report on them – who to, I dont know, as expecting a serious response from the ombudsmen, figurative complaints department, is akin to lending somebody a cigarette and expecting it back.
People like myself have to create drama to be “unwell enough” to earn and keep out stay here, as the “hearing voices” routine gets boring, as it loses its dramatic impact, effect and appeal. It ceases to be impressive like a theatre show viewed multiple times.
People like myself ask why patients who refuse medication are threatened with, and sometimes, subjected to “injection”, pompously referred to by some staff as “the needle.” (looks like they’re as weary as the DEPO they prescribe as the outside world remains.) In fact, it seems, as already suggested in a previous post, that this place is content to see us sedated so that they can play pool, chill in the staff room and get paid to sit down and watch television, but that’s besides the point, and also invites trivial talk about the “good staff” who “do their jobs.” The problem is the job itself; it is performed by people with personality types and mood changes. They are as temperamental, volatile and vaccile [update: temperamental] as myself, so what can you expect but failures, and malpractice? Ultimately, no matter how “nice” or “cool” a member of staff is, bottom line, they have their first loyalties – unless we are dealing with a renegade, of Mr 1957 from Twelve Angry Men – people, Mr Gatto informs us, are “permitted” (allowed) to exist, in as much as, and to the extent, they can be pointed at to justify the whole regime and “prove” it works – although, the worked of Jeff Schmidt, “Disciplined Minds” might suggest otherwise as he seems to imply that unless they are particularly strategic as they endure professional training, these people will be transformed, and we are not talking about a transformation called upon by people such as Genevieve Vaughan, Charles Einsenstein, George Gurdjieff, Jiddu Krishnamurti and even Marimba Ani. (Maybe Paul Goodman, R.D. Laing, and others, await a similar transformation, whilst, in the Negro corner, it seems that only those on par with Kimathi Carr share a similar concern for what Joseph Campbell refers to as a “new mythology.” (If Furedi asks where all the intellectuals have gone, we ask where all the [radical] idealists went to, only, through the film “I’m Gonna Git You Sucka,” we learnt that “they got government jobs.”
Kalinga: Now, how may I help you, my brotha?
Jack: Look. I’m here because I can’t stand what’s happening in this community!
Jack: Yeah and somebody has to make a change!
Jack: Now brotha will you help me?
Kalinga: YES … well …………. I wish I could.
Jack: Dammit man, I heard the People’s Revolutionary Army was once a thousand strong. Now what happenend?
Kalinga: They got government jobs!
Kalinga: You know that Government office building on 21st St?
Kalinga: We went down to take it over … but they were hiring that day. The brothers walked in with guns … came out with jobs. The brothers weren’t MAAAAADDD anymore, heh heh heh heh heh!
Yes … Whitey … is something else!
Maybe ObaSha is concerned with this new vision; Egbert Schuurman surely has seen the need for us to go in a different direction – informed perhaps by the ominous musings of the now deceased, Jacques Ellul – and yet, apart from these three (Kimathi Carr, Oba Shaka, Marimba Ani) who else, currently living, still has the vision. Vision was, after all, the single phrase to capture the essence of Woodson’s epic, “The Miseducation of The Negro”, and yet, whilst “The Crisis of the Negro Intellectual” and the 1948 retraction of Dubois’ appeal for a “talented tenth”, we are left with only John Brown Childs concerned about the radical implications of these technologies of total dominance and total control.
In 1962, Aldous Huxley was 50 years ahead of his era – to speculate, whilst in 1967, Stokely Carmiechal was 50 years behind. As early as 1913 Lord Birkinghead was talking about technology whilst earlier, H. G Wells made anticipations akin to those of Edward bellamy in 1888. As James McWhorter, followed by Clarence Walker might say, someone here is losing the race, and yet, who in their “correct” mind even dares identify with blackness.
The Black comes into existence through white: “white” depends for its stability on its negation, “black.” Neither exists without the other, and both come into being at the moment of imperial conquest.”
I do not want “unity” – unless, we are thinking along the lines of Amilcar Cabral and supporting it with struggle. I want, like many contemporaries, “excellence.” Mr Fuller seems to want “The United Independent Compensatory Code System Concept a textbook/workbook for Thought, Speech and/or Action for Victims of Racism (white supremacy) ” and yet, we only ask for a basic mode, and new strategy for dealing with vigilantee gatekeers, which we might otherwise, better refer to as “zookeepers.” (That “oppressor” rhetoric, not only seems outdated, but inaccurate. This new repression is endorsed by a psychopathic personality type that has had any semblance of essentialism dangerously eroded by this toxic climate.)
As Cascada might say, “I need a miracle.”
As Kirsty Hawkshaw might say, I need someone to assure me “I’ll be sincere for you.”
As for us federated people, there is a need to shift emphasis and turn in the direction of “identity politics”, or more precisely – if that computes – a need to appraise a new way of dealing with eahc other, as Ashanti Alston might propound! Yes, the issue of power remains of the utmost importance, but there NEEDS to be a rediscovery of Wittgenstein, as an appendage to, as Kimathi carr reiterated, “What Must Be Done.”
There needs to be a new understanding of language, but better still, there are still assignments for federated people to attend to and eventually complete.
We are not talking about affirmative action but the alternative resistance and challenge to repression: we are referring to our objectives; our assignment
Marva Collins “pedagogical principles”
Carter Woodson’s “Visionary WORKERS”
Asa Hilliard “Ten Issues”
Chacnellor Williams “Committee Plan”
Kimathi Carr’s “Collaborative Economics” (perhaps guided by James Prescott’s “Trust Politics”
Marimba Ani’s “New Relating” (perhaps informed by James Gilligan “On Violence.”
Eugene Rivers “Trust Funds”
There are others, but if for so long, the federated peoples have ignored these giants whilst simultaneously begging for answers then we must make a point and ask a question
firstly, “you cannot wake up someone who is pretending to be asleep”
and second, we must again ask the people “are you trying to win or just look good losing”
We are attempting to engage intersection:
When Stokely Carmeichal was at the conference along with the likes of R.D. Laing, perhaps we should have attended but beyond that, we might want to explore the discourse of Guy Gaird and pursue Linguistics, Semantics, Semiotics, Communication, and on the whole, LANGUAGE.
We might want to ask why Marimba Ani references so many of his sources despite her work being much earlier than his “presentation” and we might want to finally explore this intricate relation between psychiatry (natural science) and anthropology (social science) long with linguistics (humanities), whilst, all the while, remaining weary of “The Great Deceit”.
Maybe we might want to read Erica Carle’s urgent appeal, “Give Us The Young”, additionally concerned with why this book was reprinted, meaning, it was written earlier – as The Hate Factory – and we might want to ask who is serious, realising this emergency, appreciating the need for a new reality, and ready to respond with the urgency this situation demands, as Minister King was evaluating in his last days.
On that matter, and returning to this article a day later, Dr King urged us to abandon these stagnating “bourgeoise” values which stifled our dignity, even if riveting “ambition.”
Shifting emphasis, we might want to attempt to reinvent technology itself and, through redefining it, realise that technique consists of technology and new method; we would surely gain from a new means of communication, which, in our view, would be our great asset. We must, as Korzyski and Gurdjieff have attempted to do, like Ngugi wa Thiong’o (Decolonizing the Mind), re-examine the basis of our words, for, as Wittgenstein would remind us: “the problem is always at the beginning where we think we know that which we do not know.”
Maybe if we did that, top talent like myself would be headhunted, in the pursuit of excellence, so that I might be in a more suited and appropriate position rather than being resigned to the only safe place there is: a patient ward where I’m safe from the persecution and victimisation of being referred to as : strange, weird, deranged, deluded etc.
Aladdin was surely onto something when he, with Jasmine, dreamt up “a whole new world”, and yet, if the limits of our language are the limits of our minds, and perhaps world, maybe a re-evaluation of “TERMS” – entendres intended – is due (much like those library books we “borrowed” five years ago.)
Right now, people like myself “prefer” to be “sick” – rather than pretending – for we are offered safety in this contract; we take medication (experimentation) and we are granted asylum from a hectic world which dares to refer to us as eccentric, and normalise themselves at the expense of pathologises those “unlike” them, or “those unlike the British”.
That said, we revert to histrionic, hysterical, excessive, exaggerated, pitiful performing, all to the applause of non-existent, quite inconsequential patients who may revel in the delightful contemplation which realises “he’s too smart to be here.” Sadly, such appreciative admiration does nothing to enhance our standing never mind “radically transform our circumstance”, for surely, that mission will only be accomplished by the acquisition of “substantial resources which immediately and significantly improve the quality of our lives.” Sadly, “talk therapy” will not accomplish this, even if it is better to have words outside our heads than inside them; its better to have a revolt than a therapy, and yet, we must first protest against that policeman.